A woman went shopping with her adult daughter and made the experience miserable for everyone. She was rude to the clerks who waited on them. She complained about everything throughout the day. Their last stop was to a shoe store. After trying on a few shoes she stomped out of the store. Once outside she turned to her daughter and demanded, "Did you see the look that salesperson gave me?" The daughter replied, "Mother, she didn't give you that look. You had it when you went into the store!"
We all know people like the mother. They are hypercritical, easily offended and angry about everything. They seem to go out of their way looking for something that will upset them. Unless they are complaining about something they can't be happy. It's a horrible way to live. If confronted, they will just respond that they are just being themselves. The good news is that it doesn't have to be permanent. We can change some aspects of our personality.
People spend vast sums of money on beauty treatments and plastic surgery to change some aspect of their physical appearance they don't like. No matter how much we change our physical appearance, our personality will still come out and show us for the person we are. A person may strive towards physical perfection, but if they maintain a sour personality they will still not be attractive.
Changing our personalities often means making small chances in our actions. For example, a person who is naturally an introvert is not likely to ever be the toast of the party. However, they can take steps to be more outgoing and engaging. My personality is very much that of an introvert. As I tell people, I can very easily blend into the wall paper at a social event, but I choose to not do that. I go to people and begin a conversation with them. It's not always easy, especially at first, but it's usually worth the effort.
A person who is very controlling can learn to let go and trust others to make good decisions for themselves. They can learn to delegate and trust people to complete their task.
Perhaps one of the hardest personality traits to change is anger. Angry people are those likely to insist that it's just the way they are. They can fly off the handle at the slightest provocation and expect everyone to be OK with that. Angry people wonder why people avoid them and friends stop coming around. It's because people get tired of walking on eggshells around them afraid something they will say or do will set them off again.
Angry people can learn to control their anger. They can choose to respond better to triggers that previously would cause them to erupt.
The first step in getting a personality makeover is to identify the behaviors you need to change. If you're not sure where to start, ask someone who loves you enough to be honest with you. Once you identify the behavior that needs to change you can begin to think through the steps you need to take to make that change. None of this is going to happen overnight so be patient with yourself.
You may want to bring in some professional help, especially if your behaviors are having a negative impact on your life and/or your career. There's nothing wrong with bringing in a life coach or a counselor to help you work through the process you need to follow to change aspects of your personality. Having someone to hold you accountable will probably make the process go quicker and more smoothly.
No one has to feel trapped with a personality issue that is causing them problems. You can make adjustments to your personality if you choose to do so.
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